Our Motto: Zero Bullshit
You have no time for fluffy metrics, convoluted processes, or, frankly,
bullshit. Neither do we. Here’s our definition of what constitutes
bullshit, and what we opt to do instead.
Get a personalized, bullshit-free website or app audit.
The Brain Bytes approach to avoiding bullshit marketing
Bullshit reporting
Here are some Analytics screenshots coupled with insights that explain away the red. No need for you to know what these metrics mean.
BBC reporting
Here are detailed, specific reports that highlight successes and explore the red in a way that helps you understand and get closer to your digital goals.
Bullshit KPIs
You won’t believe this! The website got 3M impressions!
BBC KPIs
Organic conversions increased by 30%, which resulted in an additional $40,679 in YOY revenue.
Bullshit sales
You need a new website. I think you need a website. To be honest, you just need a whole new website?
BBC sales
What problems are you trying to solve? How will we know when the problem is solved? What is the most efficient (and inexpensive) path to solving this problem?
Bullshit websites
It’s so pretty. I love the way it scrolls.
BBC websites
It converts. It makes money. It does the heavy lifting and doesn’t break. And it’s pretty.
Bullshit UI/UX
I have a feeling that people don’t like this tagline.
BBC UI/UX
The data shows 40% of traffic drops off after visiting this page. Let’s split test a different placement of the CTA button.
Bullshit accountability
It’s your issue. It’s not our fault. There’s no record of the project requirements but we think we did everything you asked. It’s too complicated to explain to you. We made a mistake but we still have to charge for the fix. Sorry that doesn’t work for you, but we’re going to keep doing things this way.
BBC accountability
Here is what we agreed on. Here is where we succeeded. Here is what we could have done better. Here are some disconnects on which we can share accountability. Here is how we want to make up for our mistakes. Here is how we hope to improve this relationship going forward.
Bullshit digital marketing
We’ll take care of everything. You’ll never hear from us. Just set it and forget it!
BBC digital marketing
We will partner very closely. You will know my cat’s name. We’ll both be smarter and better for our time together.
Bullshit responsiveness
My website is down and my account manager won’t get back to me!
BBC responsiveness
We always respond ASAP. Just ask our owner Jason Sirotin. In fact, here’s his personal cell: 678-855-5169. (Yes, really.)
Bullshit strategy
Here’s a pretty pitch deck based on our gut assumptions about your brand. Did you know “project managers” and “executive decision-makers” are your target personas? Pretty hard-hitting stuff there. We only really scanned some high-level industry data, but I spent days picking the perfect stock images and fonts! Hope you absolutely loveee it… because we charge hourly.
BBC strategy
We’ve spent months thinking about your brand. We’ve interviewed every major stakeholder at your organization. We’ve talked to your current clients and your prospects. We’re stalking your competitors. We’ve reviewed all available industry data at length. We’re starting to see your website metrics in our dreams. Here’s a 15-page document full of fact-based insights and recommendations.
Bullshit SEO
We can pretty much guarantee page-one search engine results in less than six months.
BBC SEO
We’ll help the right traffic with the right intent find your website, in a realistic timeframe that considers search engine ranking factors.
Bullshit philosophies
The client is always right. We will abandon our strategy to pursue that thing someone on your team thinks might be a good idea.
BBC philosophies
The data is always right. We will do the most important work to drive the results we set out to accomplish together, and challenge you if you want to do something else.
Don’t buy it without reading the reviews.
Russ Sauvé
RESURGENS ORTHOPAEDICS
“I really appreciate the onus BBC takes in optimizing our relationship. I’ve never met an agency that actually wants to know what they’re doing wrong.“
Kim Carlos
CONTROLSCAN
“Since we’ve started working with Brain Bytes, we’ve seen a huge increase in our KPIs, including the number of leads that have come in.
They challenge themselves and their clients to get aligned on goals, clarify the metrics that matter, and tackle the most important challenges and opportunities in an efficient and measured way.”
Matt Williams
AD BIOSCIENCES
“I continue to bring new projects to the BBC team because they treat my business like they would their own, making them a partner, not an agency.
The team’s dedicated approach to tackle challenges head on with a thoughtful and strategic rationale has been a key ingredient for our success.”
